This is the first day, I started counting as the last ninety days in my La flora Resort & Spa. I hope there will be lots of things waiting for me to face. I am not afriad either it is good or bad. I have survived for 9 months with strange people. How can I not be alive with thr last ninety days. Let see what will happen in these last bueatiful ninety day at the lovely workplace and nice co-workers. I heard that there are the same like other hotels. People get jealous at each other. The BIG is afraid of losing the CHAIR. As I am a very least person got that kind of thing too. They don't need to be fear of me because I am not good but I try and see things differently from their prospective. I like to have an eye for problems where I can improve things to be better. At the same time I learn things fast. This is way I was got hurt from what I have done here.
I am so tired in fighting (I am not really fighting though.) Here I have learned that people are not sincere to each other, they talk to each other when they need something or when they have the same goal for what they want. People have an affair. Most of them as I have seen so far. This is another thing i couldn't have done. I don't think that I was better but I just can't do that. I don't dare to get a boyfriend here because I am not so sure whether he has wives or kids in the other place or not. Of course, it is mot a will of the LOrd for what he wants me to do.
i dont want to regret if I have done something that I know I shouldn't do it. I tried to keep my mouth shout. But they also tried to open it up. I have a very bad word so I didn't want to let it out.
I am so exhuasted for what I am doing now. My face and my eyes are always not like the person I am. The person who is always happy not even care for what will be in the future. I was and am now watch my back and keep an eye for poeple who wanted to take me down and let me down. However I am who I am. I couldn't be sad more tahna three days and I can be bAck with my usaul life and self. I am having fun watching them laugh at me, and think that I was in my depressed situation and had no way out. These things shall not be in my heart. I attempted to be nice to anyone but they didn't take the nice part, they needed the bad side which I couldn't understand.
To be Continuous
I try to write at least 3 days a week for my counting days.
This will be the last day of Shawna who has been at La Flora with me for a few months. I wouldn't have this much fun if I don't have her here with me in the last two months.
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