God knows for sure!

I tried to do things by my onw streght and tried to deal with God even though I know I shouldn't have resisted to ignore what God wants me to do. So the result is "Bad things happened" and I just have to say that I feel so releave from this. I know my heart is not really in a good condition when I keep doing it. But Some how I wanted to try till God said you have to let it go. Or I will let somesone let lit go. I was thankful because I finally should my way to do. If he let me do, I would hang on to it.